Wednesday, May 19, 2010

Random Thought, Slanted Perception

I had an epiphany some time ago that involved how I discussed my relationships with the people closest to me.  I often wondered why or how my friends' perception of my partners soured.  In some instances they liked the people I chose and in other times there was disdain. The answer was simple, but something I never considered until now.  I was only sharing with them the things I didn't enjoy about the relationship and the person I was involved with at the time.

Our friends form opinions about our partners primarily by what we tell them.  Generally, we share the highs with our friends when the relationship is new and fresh, but as it matures we focus mostly on what isn't working, what disappoints us, and what we'd change which causes our friends to dislike our companion because they're only privy to the downside of things.  If we only give our friends the negative aspects without balancing it with all the great things we enjoy about our partner, then there's no balance.

Share the good and the bad if you're going to share any at all...

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1 comment:

  1. Good point, but often times after that representative pulls you in and the real character comes out its hard to let go. So, you are forced to complain and talk about the negative aspects, because there seem to be so many and of course you are still too tangled up in their web to leave. Until that day comes, 'venting' helps me feel better.