My 34th Birthday...

Thirty-four years ago today I was born with a purpose, as we all are. I think ultimately our task here is to find what we were put on Earth to do. To, in some way, make a contribution that will make this place better for the next person and future generations. I believe many of the disparities we see in life are a result of some never knowing their purpose to even pursue one, while others are so crippled by fear of trying which results in untapped gifts that the world will never get to witness. I often think about songs, books or movies we'll never know of because a gifted writer gave up because of obstacles or fear. More tragically, a scientist that could potentially find the cure for cancer or AIDS, but didn't have the drive to work days and attend school by night.

I've encountered countless setbacks while trying to pursue a dream that seems so close at times, yet, so far away. At one stage in my life I thought the setbacks were indications that I was on the wrong path or that I was pursuing the wrong dream, but a friend reminded me to never get distracted by the journey because the end is still the end. It's already written. He continued by saying just adapt to whatever comes on the path to your destination because that's a part of the fabric of your story. He closed with, "The race is not given to the swift or to the strong, but to the one who endureth to the end."

Every single obstacle that we encounter is for our greatest good. Run to your dreams...

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“The Different I’ve Needed…”

I wanted us to approach this
with the same fervor, yet ease,
in which we approach our friendships.
Those aren’t deliberate, they just are-without calculation.
They happen organically as a result of genuine fondness.
It’s the unmistaken chemistry when kindred spirits connect,
and everything else just seems to fall in place.
No one frets over when you’ll actually get together,
the possibility of the inevitable arguments
(that will occur) at some point in every friendship,
nor do we question how long it will last (the friendship)
because we know the best friendships aren’t or cant be planned;
they simply evolve.
So, for me, the idea was to free fall in the same way.
I believe we approach relationships too cautiously
because of past hurt, past pain.
My plan, for us, was to go into it without fear
that the novelty would expire or
worry the newness would dwindle away & we become regular.
For the first time, ever, I began to feel as if someone
got me on multiple levels;
as an artist; a person; more importantly, as a partner.
He could see my dreams because my dreams are his dreams
with a different slant to them.
In finding him, I found the different I’ve needed.
Before, I settled for the ones that lacked
a sense of self & I thought it my responsibility to save them from themselves…
I thought if they came to me damaged,
in need of repair,
I could fix them…
The return, on my investment,
would be loyalty, longevity, consistency and monogamy,
for me…I thought.
I would soon discover that wasn’t a guarantee.
One epiphany after another led me to realize
that although the players involved changed,
I was the common denominator in every scenario,
and I was allowing people to “choose me”.
For the first time, ever, I’m choosing…
and this time I chose better…
He’s the different I’ve needed in my life…
He’s the antithesis of every person I’ve dated or loved.
I'm no longer the most interesting
part of the equation
because he, too, has carved a piece out of this life for himself
and it’s the perfect complement I’ve needed…